Owning Your Actions

We live in a world where nobody expects you to own your actions. If you get a bad grade on your report card, it’s because your teacher hates you. If you get a speeding ticket, it’s because you had to get to the movie theater. If you cheat on your wife, it’s because she hasn’t been paying attention to you. You simply aren’t expected to own your actions.

I’ve got news for you. You got a bad grade because you didn’t study. You got a speeding ticket because you were driving too fast. You cheated on your wife because you’re a jerk.

On Sunday there was an altercation between San Diego Padres player Milton Bradley and an Umpire. It all started earlier in the game when Bradley wasn’t happy about a call. Later in the game, Bradley was at 1st base and the Umpire started to give him a hard time. A fan in the stands started to heckle Bradley, and when Bradley pointed out the fan, the Umpire ejected Bradley from the game.

I agree that the Umpire was out of line, but then Bradley snapped and went after the Umpire. Bradley was restrained by his own coach but continued to fight. Eventually the coach wrestled Bradley to the ground and injured him, tearing his ACL (knee) and knocking him out for the rest of the season.

After the game, Bradley took no responsibility for his actions:

“It’s terrible. And now, because of him, my knee’s hurt. If this costs me my season because of that, he needs to be reprimanded. I’m taking some action. I’m not going to stand pat and accept this, because I didn’t do nothing wrong.”

Milton Bradley refuses to own his actions. He said it right there. “Because of him, my knee is hurt.” Bradley thinks he is the victim, and he thinks his injury is the fault of the Umpire. He simply does not understand that if he hadn’t reacted in the way that he did, he would not have injured his knee.

Yes, the Umpire was out of line for what he did, but he is not the one that cost Milton Bradley his season. The Umpire may have said some horrible things, and ejected Bradley when it wasn’t due, but Bradley is the one that went crazy and had to be wrestled to the ground. The Umpire did not pounce on Bradley. The Umpire did not hit Bradley in the back of the knee with a bat. Bradley reacted to the Umpire’s childish actions, by acting like an ever bigger child himself.

When someone doesn’t see the need to own their actions, they do not accept any fault. It seems totally reasonable for them to do whatever suits them in the moment and then blame someone else for the result. We do this every day. Our boss, spouse, friends, family. We blame everyone for everything. If you start to learn to own your actions and take responsibility for the results of your actions, you will begin to see how often you sabotage your own existence.

If you enjoyed this post or have something to add to the conversation, please leave a comment and I will be sure to respond.